I have a new apartment, a job, a beautiful family, a super smart, handsome husband who is in an amazing grad school program with lots of opportunity. I have wonderful support from my friends, family, and in laws. I have an adorable baby kitten who Addie fondly only refers to "baby Cat" while she drags the poor thing across the floor by the tail. But the sweet "baby Cat" runs away for only a few moments before she returns back to the affectionate toddler wanting more. They are an adorable duo.
I have the most perfect apartment. I can not say enough how much I love it. It felt like home from the moment I walked in. And Addie calls it home. Though she misses grandma's house a lot, she does enjoy her new room and big girl bed.
I have the most adorable little two year old. She is so full of life, wonderment and joy. I will catch her singing "la la ba ba he he he he " to herself as she plays. She will burst out in "walkie walkie walkie walkie" As we trot across the street to the park. She loves to cuddle. She gives the best kisses. I cannot describe the joy she brings me.
I am learning to cope with the things that bring me down.
Stress, grief, trauma, pain, depression; these are things that find their ways into my mind and overwhelm me to point where I feel like the sky is pressing down on me. I realize that this is something that I have fought with my entire life. This overwhelming feeling drowns me in my own subconscious till I feel nothing but numbness. But as I come to these realizations, and cope with my grief and my past I find that I can "break this sky". I am stronger then I know.
God has blessed me with so many positive and amazing things. And he gave me such potential.
My depression, my anxieties, my paranoia can sometimes get in the way of my progression. But not anymore.
I am okay. I am learning and I am succeeding.
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